How many times have you been in front of your keyboard like, “It’s time to get shit done and write the best words of my life,” then five minutes later, you are on YouTube trying to figure out how to build a hermit house in a field using an old shipping container and wet cardboard from behind an Arby’s? Y-yeah me neither.
If you are trying to have a productive writing session, this can be the kiss of death. Then you sit around like a sad sack of ass, moping about not being productive, and promising you’ll make up for it the next day. And don’t.
Congratulations, you’re a writer.
Here’s What Other Writers Won’t Admit To You
The world full of distractions are pitfalls to all writers and those distractions are a necessary part of the writing process if you use them constructively. Typing may be done at a keyboard but writing is so MUCH more than the clickity-clackity of your fingers. Forcing an aneurism at the keyboard won’t produce your best work, either.
Open Wide, Here Comes Some Truth Bombs
Whether it’s ‘research’ or ‘for academic purposes,’ we all pressure ourselves when it comes to putting words to the page. Society has so deeply romanticized the pain of the writing process that we’ve made it seem like a godlike endeavor that requires a piece of your soul and the tears of a baby angel to create a fleck of creativity. Sometimes that may be true, but not every time. Most successful writers will tout that the key to being a great creative writer is consistency, which is absolutely true and you should follow that advice. But I’ll take it a step further. It is consistency, but with the entire writing process. And the process looks remarkably like the YuGiOh card game.
Time To D-D-D-D-DDDDDDDo The Work!
Let’s take a look at the YuGiOh card phases. The original ones when Exodia was creeping around every corner and could turn you into a pocket-holding prison bitch at any moment.
Let’s briefly look at the phase structure below.
I showed this for two reasons: As a grown-ass man, I believe this game should be taught at all grade schools to teach children the cruel reality of who their real friends are… and because I wanted to show the repeatable, common structure to YuGiOh gameplay. Once both players go through the process, the process repeats. Writing has a similar structure.
- The Brainstorming Phase
- The Research Phase
- The Typing Phase
- The Editing Phase
Then the process repeats, like fucking magic!
The Brainstorming Phase, The Typing Phase, and The Editing Phase are just as they sound. Then you have the Research Phase, which is primarily what I’m talking about.
The Research Phase, which may be blended with parts of the Brainstorming Phase, is as much of the writing process as the Typing Phase. Percentage-wise and depending on the project, the other phases may be of equal or greater importance but as writers and artists, we get so good at beating ourselves up that we don’t realize our brains need this phase. The research excites us, soften us up, and eases us into the dreaded Typing Phase. But God forbid we actually have to do something the opposite of fun.
Nobody wants to take the time to write a paper because we all wish we could know everything and words just appeared on a page, perfectly edited. But, we have to. So unless Elon Musk makes think-to-text brain mods a reality, we got to do this the old-fashioned way.
Unfortunately, it’s at this point that we over-research or are caught in the neverending loop of fucking around on the internet to avoid getting to the hard part. There is always some excuse to avoid writing but I am here to save the day!
Stop Being a Bitch About Your Creativity And Budget Your Time
Sounds harsh I know, but if you want to be a successful content-producing writer that has to be a hard-fast rule. Giving yourself a deadline and understanding that there’s only so much time in a day can greatly improve how much you get done. Think about school and when you pumped out that five-page paper the night before it was due. It was exhilarating, exhausting, and productive. You cursed out your teacher the whole time but the paper got done. That’s the writing process in a nutshell, except you are the only one keeping yourself accountable, and moving your deadline can mean you never finish anything.
Let’s change that shit!
How The Ass Do I Make Sure I Write?
It’s hella easy! Mix together everything we talked about and put together a writing schedule!
First, figure out your daily time slots for writing. Yes, I said daily. Writing consistently will build muscle memory and a writing habit, which are requirements for being a good writer. The time slots can be consecutive or spread throughout the day for any amount of time. Ten minutes. Ten hours. Just write it down and proceed, motha fu-!
Sorry. My inner Samuel L. Jackson came out…
Second (in my best Sam L. voice), Divide yo time among the writing phases! Starting out it doesn’t matter too much how you split the time as long as you are completing the writing process daily.
Third, Just do the shit and do it often! It seems overly simplistic but that’s because it is. As human beings, we can overcomplicate anything. Writing, however, is that simple. We just get caught up in the parts of life that seem arduous and painful, then put up every roadblock possible to stop from doing the arduous and painful things. Myself included.
The only way to get around those roadblocks is to go through them. Every. Damn. Day.
Like the Juggernaut on PCP.
