Ooo… You done fucked up now.
Welcome and sorry in advance. You just stepped into the rip-roaring clusterfuck that is my mind. Unfortunate perks/ side effects (depending on how nasty you are) include laughing until you get cataracts, possibly uncontrollable bowels, and joining my demented ass as you get whipped through my rollercoaster of consciousness and mental misadventures.
Why The Hell Am I Doing This?
Surprise, bitch! I don’t know! We’re learning together like Sesame Street!
Most of this ride will feel like if your buddies sat you and another friend in a parked car, putting steering wheels in your hands. Except, you’re both drunk asleep and they’re shaking the car, screaming, “My family! I’ve lost everything!” You and hit-and-run accomplice #2 both wake up with your hearts in your butts, frantically trying to stop the car as tears and snot run down your faces. Fun and therapy had for all.
In all seriousness, as there are few of these moments, I have waaaaaay too much fun shit floating around my brain and I felt like it was a disservice to society not to share it. So, I’ve resolved to bounce my ideas around the universe and hopefully, it’ll benefit us both in unexpected ways. Like finding LSD in your Halloween candy and after building a fallout shelter to keep the melty-face people at bay, you realized, “Hey, I’m an excellent Structural Engineer.”
When thinking about why I wanted to start up this blog, I struggled with the sheer load of other blogs out there. Why the hell would anyone care about my blog? Then it hit me like my Abuela with a chancla; none of those blogs had my voice.
I needed to rectify that.
Ok, so I may have fibbed about not knowing why I’m doing this. Additionally, due to me being a work-from-home recluse for so long and constantly yelling out into the ether, I found myself needing a new echo chamber. And bruh, if my walls could talk, I would be buried under a jail. I chose the greater path. I would take the healthier route that so many of my millennial cohorts have done before me; talk about my private life to a degree that will either suck you in or sicken you. Either way, happy to help.
Normally, I’m a fairly private person. More so because I thought if I didn’t have anything important to say or something that wouldn’t contribute to the current situation and/or world, I shouldn’t say it. I was wrong. The ‘Rona has reinforced how much solitude blows and that humans need face-to-face connection. However, we had to make do with Zoom, FaceTime calls, and talking over the phone.
We missed people. Personally, I missed being hit with the catharsis of honesty and vulnerability of being in someone else’s presence. Having someone understand your pain and respond with “Real talk” or “I feel you” or “put your pants on Jeff, little Jeff just winked at me.” This was my new outlet, and I believe I needed one after what we’ve survived. A new outlet, not little Jeff.
Why A Blog? Why Not Just Stick To Social Media?
Oh boy, that’s one I constantly rack my brain over daily. In truth, I hate writing.
I don’t write because I want to. I write because I need to.
It’s like an itch in your brain. You claw through your skull to reach it, but only the banging of your head against the soft yet unforgiven wall brings temporary relief. Then you masochistically do it again tomorrow.
It hurts so good…
This necessity of mine spurred from writing funny texts and loving the responses. When I was younger, I hated essays and papers because the writing styles were so rigid and boring. Early on, no one near me loved writing enough to say, “This shit can be incredible. Fam, have you ever built a world in your head before?” Nope. It was straight up, “If this train leaves Japan at 8am and this train leaves San Francisco at 10pm, tell me how you think Napoleon’s balls smelled during wartime? Use citations. Three pages, single-spaced, in forty-five minutes.”
Now, I can’t get enough of it. So much that my boy Kyle and I write (if you can truly call it that) every Saturday, but I’ll talk about that another time. I’m writing novels, screenplays, comedy skits, etc. full speed ahead with no chance of stopping. It was a natural progression for me. Hopefully, writing out the joy in my brain can put a smile on your face.
Sweet Jesus, Just Say What Topics You’ll Cover.
Damn, fine! I was just trying to be philosophical and shit. In short, I’ll cover everything and anything. Though, I do have a few topics that I’ll revisit time and time again. To start, because I don’t want to scare your soul through the back of your pants, I’ve curated a few items to whet your palette. In no particular order:
- My Thoughts and how I got there because fuck it. This will be a myriad of topics to be reorganized on the fly. Off the top; the sub-categories of personal goal setting and organization, food, and ranting will reside under this umbrella.
- Writing as it brings me so much damn joy. Please see bullshit above.
- And My Vlog transcripts to show you I’m as animated and loud in real life. With links to my YouTube channel, of course. I’m not a savage.
Wrap it up, B!
But for real, I just wanted a place where I could be me, unfiltered. As I’m new to Los Angeles, on the Best Coast- I mean West Coast…
I meant that shit.
A-hem! I felt it was time to perform the cliché of shedding my old habits to try something different by making myself uncomfortable. Guess what? Best thing I ever did. Shattering my comfort zone helped me get back on my health grind. It forced me to shine a light on what could make me better, and at the end of the day, it will make me a better writer and person.
If I can share anything with you in this sentimental diatribe of doo-doo, it would be – get your ass out! Get your ass outdoors. Get your ass outside of your routine. Get your ass outside of your head and into the better part of yourself. In fact, I’m so confident I’ll hashtag it.
#AssOut2022
Wait, that didn’t sound right…